Remember the good ol’ days when flipping through a magazine or watching a sitcom was your only exposure to “reality”? Fast forward to today, and we’re bombarded with a constant stream of curated lives, filtered photos, and drama-filled shows presented as “real.” It’s enough to make you wonder: where does reality TV and social media end, and our actual reality begin?

There’s no denying the allure of these carefully constructed online worlds and shows. They offer a glimpse into lives that seem more exciting, glamorous, or dramatic than our own. A study by the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology even suggests that reality TV consumption can be “escapist” and provide a temporary break from the mundane. Think about it: wouldn’t we all love a walk-in closet the size of some apartments or the manufactured drama of a dating show?

But there’s a catch. Constant exposure to these fabricated realities can distort our perception of the actual world. Here’s how:

The Highlight Reel vs. The Messy Middle: Comparing Our Lives to a Fantasy

Social media, in particular, thrives on a curated version of reality. People post their best vacation photos, perfectly staged outfits, and meticulously crafted updates. This constant barrage of highlight reels can make our own lives seem dull in comparison. A 2018 report by the University of Pennsylvania found that “comparing oneself to others on social media can lead to social isolation and depression.” Suddenly, that quiet night in with a book feels uneventful compared to your friend’s weekend getaway plastered all over Instagram.

The problem with comparing ourselves to these unrealistic portrayals is that we’re focusing on a tiny, edited snapshot of someone else’s life. We forget the struggles, the bad hair days, and the piles of laundry that don’t make it onto social media feeds. Reality TV isn’t much better. While some shows document genuine human experiences, many rely on manufactured drama and conflict to keep viewers hooked. This fabricated drama can distort our perception of normal relationships and interactions.

The Filtered Truth: Unrealistic Beauty Standards and the Pursuit of Perfection

Social media and reality TV are also notorious for perpetuating unrealistic beauty standards. Facetune, filters, and carefully chosen camera angles can create an illusion of flawless skin, perfect bodies, and effortless style. 

A 2019 study by the Body Positive found that “exposure to idealized images on social media can lead to body dissatisfaction and unhealthy body image ideals.” Constantly comparing ourselves to these airbrushed images can chip away at our self-esteem and fuel the pursuit of an unattainable ideal.

It’s important to remember that the people we see online and on TV are often heavily styled and made-up by professionals. Their lives are not a reflection of what’s “normal.”

Finding Balance: Reclaiming Our Reality

So, does this mean we all need to ditch our phones and swear off reality TV? Not necessarily. The key is finding a healthy balance and being mindful of how these portrayals can influence our perception. Here are some tips:

• Practice social media detox: Take breaks from social media to reconnect with your own life and appreciate the unfiltered moments.
• Focus on gratitude: Instead of comparing yourself to others, cultivate an attitude of gratitude for the good things in your own life.
• Engage critically with media: Question what you see online and on TV. Remember, it’s often carefully constructed to evoke a certain reaction.
• Seek out authentic connections: Spend time with people who make you feel good about yourself and focus on building real-life relationships.

Ultimately, the best antidote to distorted reality is embracing your own. Social media and reality TV can be entertaining, but they shouldn’t dictate our sense of self or happiness. By being mindful and intentional with our media consumption, we can reclaim our own reality, messy middle and all.